I’m So Happy For You (Not)

Obvi, We're The Ladies

Photo: Alanna Bagladi Photo: Alanna Bagladi

With all the big decisions coming up in my life, it’s not hard to get competitive. I constantly feel like I’m standing on a big cliff with a huge pitfall behind me while a giant hand is slowly but surely pushing me towards the edge. My classes have become more of a stake-out of peers to measure where I stand against my fellow future interviewees. While I know that jealousy is an energy-draining, negative response to insecurity, I can’t help but be full of it at the moment. I would so much rather be happy for my friends who are finding a place in their fields; but as the graduation clock ticks by, I find I can’t escape the fear and insecurity that often accompanies a looming big change in one’s life. 

I know very well what non-pessimists would say to this: You should be excited! You’ve…

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